recently learned about Lita Ford, the guitarist for Joan Jett's band The Runaways, who found herself in perhaps one of the cockamamie predicaments of all time
this shit literally sounds like the plot of a yuri manga. girliepop walked right into the setup for a 60,000 word slowburn f/f fanfic and couldn't even appreciate it
ALTThe reason she got back with them is almost as funny. She literally got Straight Larried cause they couldn't find anyone else who could shred as good.
Today a dental hygienist said I have "very stringy saliva" and I still have no idea what that means or how I'm meant to feel about it
Diagnosed with "hentai saliva"
No no no. This can all stop here.
i think all quiet on the western front and the lord of the rings are in direct conversation with each other, as in theyre the retelling of the same war with one saying here’s what happened, we all died, and it did not matter at all and another going hush little boy, of course we won, of course your friends came back
someone should remake lord of the rings as a grandfather telling a fantasy story to his grand child with flashbacks to world war one showing the dead boys and men the characters were based on. grandpa why didn’t they just fly. because they didn’t. they didn’t.
i’m fine
I will never get over how Tolkien & Lewis took the horrors of war and spun them into fantasy.
Shivering in the trenches dreaming of cozy hobbit holes, shaking as bombs pockmark a forest and imagining each shallow mud-filled crater contains a new world—that maybe there are still as many beautiful things in the universe as there are bombs—that maybe the world is bigger than this moment and this ugliness and one day this will be a peaceful forest again full of small ponds.
I mean look at these photos of the shell craters in Sanctuary Woods, near Ypres Belgium and tell me it’s not the Wood Between The Worlds:
there should be an episode of taskmaster whrre they get put in gory and torturous saw traps but crucially the tone is exactly the same
The first rule of violent trench warfare is to have fun and be yourself
The second rule is DONT GET YOUR FUCKING FEET WET
(poll) in a survival cannibalism situation, which part of jared harris would you consume first? (knock-down drag-out debate raging in the tags including sidebar quibbling about how to read the ‘survival cannibalism’ aspect of the question, every single person who has reblogged is acting like there is a single objectively correct answer, ‘tumy’ is winning over ‘The Dick’ by a significant margin) (289 notes)
text post about something a cartoon villain could do to a man, e. g. “i love men. i need to put his ass on a long conveyor belt with the roaring sound of the immense furnace at the factory’s heart growing louder with every inch he advances towards his doom” (11,202 notes)
a really horny crop of some kind of old public domain art, e. g. the corner of a medieval tapestry with a court jester on a leash (6,677 notes)
gifset of that one scene from sas rogue heroes (1,294 notes)
fancam of adam nagaitis as cornelius hickey from amc’s the terror (2018) to a megan thee stallion song (reblogged 4x by different mutuals with tags protesting the fact that i reblogged this 35 times in a row) (98 notes)
painting of a tall ship (60 notes)
the mountain goats lyric/webweave (tagged “prev” and then everyone’s chatter in the tags is just like onomatopoeia of guttural agonized howls) (3,845 notes)
gif of gay porn which i will “like” before scrolling down and realizing that it is a pro wrestling gifset and with a heavy heart proceeding to “unlike” (613 notes)
dragonqueer
roach-works
theft!! crime!!!!
Hey.hey. Hi! Hello. Parley. Sparrows reporting in for assist with baguette. Assist commence. Fear not! Stand down! Sparrows assist. Thanks for holding, your call is important to us.
